A recent e-mail from Godsminute.com ....Enjoy!
They're Back! More Church Bulletin Bloopers:
It is written; IF I SAY, 'I WILL FORGET MY COMPLAINT,
I WILL CHANGE MY EXPRESSION, AND SMILE.'
( JOB 9:27 * NIV )
Dear John,
We all have days when we feel overwhelmed with life's
many problems. However complaining about then doesn't
change a thing! So why not smile instead of complain, for
it is said; "Smile and the whole World smiles with you, frown
and you frown alone!"
Now what better way to find a smile than to laugh with joy.
So enjoy today's message, and let it be said; "OUR MOUTHS
WERE FILLED WITH LAUGHTER, OUR TONGUES WITH
SONGS OF JOY." For; THE LORD HAS DONE GREAT THINGS
FOR US, AND WE ARE FILLED WITH JOY. ( PSALM 126:2-3 )
Therefore, John, today's message is one that was sent to
us by one of our Dear Subscribers. It will bring a smile, as well
as, a laugh or two. It contains words that were found in Church
Bulletins.
___________________________
Thank God for Church ladies with typewriters. These sentences
actually appeared in Church Bulletins or were announced in Church
Services. So sit back and let us begin.....
Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at
Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon
tonight: "Searching for Jesus."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in
the recreation hall. Come out and watch us beat Christ the King.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of
those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your
husbands.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled
due to a conflict.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile
at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't
care much about you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass ! this way again," giving
obvious pleasure to the congregation.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a
nursery downstairs.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the
help they can get.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more
transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests
tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
All My Love & Prayers,
Pastor Allen
[ Prayer Requests---Contact Us---Bible Study---*Donations* ]
at: http://www.godsminute.com
Apostle Paul Ministries, P O Box 55996, Hayward, CA 94545
(c) Copyright 2012 by Apostle Paul Ministries. All Rights Reserved
A World-Wide Ministry for Jesus Christ
It is written; IF I SAY, 'I WILL FORGET MY COMPLAINT,
I WILL CHANGE MY EXPRESSION, AND SMILE.'
( JOB 9:27 * NIV )
Dear John,
We all have days when we feel overwhelmed with life's
many problems. However complaining about then doesn't
change a thing! So why not smile instead of complain, for
it is said; "Smile and the whole World smiles with you, frown
and you frown alone!"
Now what better way to find a smile than to laugh with joy.
So enjoy today's message, and let it be said; "OUR MOUTHS
WERE FILLED WITH LAUGHTER, OUR TONGUES WITH
SONGS OF JOY." For; THE LORD HAS DONE GREAT THINGS
FOR US, AND WE ARE FILLED WITH JOY. ( PSALM 126:2-3 )
Therefore, John, today's message is one that was sent to
us by one of our Dear Subscribers. It will bring a smile, as well
as, a laugh or two. It contains words that were found in Church
Bulletins.
___________________________
Thank God for Church ladies with typewriters. These sentences
actually appeared in Church Bulletins or were announced in Church
Services. So sit back and let us begin.....
Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at
Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon
tonight: "Searching for Jesus."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in
the recreation hall. Come out and watch us beat Christ the King.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of
those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your
husbands.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled
due to a conflict.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile
at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't
care much about you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass ! this way again," giving
obvious pleasure to the congregation.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a
nursery downstairs.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the
help they can get.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more
transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests
tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
All My Love & Prayers,
Pastor Allen
[ Prayer Requests---Contact Us---Bible Study---*Donations* ]
at: http://www.godsminute.com
Apostle Paul Ministries, P O Box 55996, Hayward, CA 94545
(c) Copyright 2012 by Apostle Paul Ministries. All Rights Reserved
A World-Wide Ministry for Jesus Christ
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